Jimmy Kimmel feels bad that Donald Trump’s hard work during the hush-money trial went to waste. “Poor Donald Trump, seven weeks of sleep farting all down the drain, all for nothing,” the host of Jimmy Kimmel Live! told audiences on Thursday, the same day the former president was found guilty of 34 felonies in relation to his unprecedented hush-money trial. “You do have to hand it to him, no president have ever been convicted more than Donald Trump.

Last night’s episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live, which brought a longstanding joke feud between between Kimmel and Matt Damon to a head by having Damon hijack the show and host it himself, scored Kimmel’s best audience in its new 11:35 timeslot yet. The show earned a 2.92 rating overall and a 1.23 rating with Adults 18-49, handily beating Leno (0.76) by 62% and Letterman (0.56) by 120%. The episode was such a big hit that ABC has opted to re-air it in primetime on Tuesday night at 10pm, replacing a rerun of some show called Body of Proof.

Hosting the Golden Globes is a tough gig. As Andy Samberg noted after co-hosting the show with Sandra Oh in 2019, the room is very “boozy” and notoriously difficult to cull: “At home, I think you can tell it’s loud, but imagine that times ten.” Add to this the status of the attendees and their tendency to err on the side of the self-serious — not to mention the pressure of the massive at-home audience scrutinizing the performance live — and it’s obvious why many prominent comedians have turned down the gig in recent years.

On Killing Eve, Jodie Comer’s Villanelle spends as much time artfully murdering people as she does seducing them. And she doesn’t discriminate: Villanelle will joyfully kill and/or sleep with men and women. Or, in the case of her primary obsession, Eve Polastri (Sandra Oh), Villanelle will joyfully accept a knife to the abdomen: “She did it to show me how much she cares about me,” Villanelle explains of Eve’s stabby behavior early on in season two.

“Cruise,” the debut single by the country duo Florida Georgia Line, is baffling—a song that causes a critic to shelve his two-bit theorizing, drop to his knees, and tremble before the mysterious movements of the pop gods. The song recently logged its 22nd week at the top of Billboard’s Hot Country Songs rundown, shattering a record that had stood since 1955. The weird part is, “Cruise” doesn’t sound like much at all.

Jackson. Joe Jackson, the Jackson family patriarch, has died at 89, TMZ reports. He had reportedly battled cancer and was hospitalized in June. According to TMZ, he died on Wednesday in Los Angeles surrounded by his wife, Katherine, and some of his children and grandchildren. Jackson infamously managed his son Michael Jackson during his early career, as well as Michael’s brothers – Jackie, Jermaine, Marlon, Michael, and Tito – as part of the Jackson 5, as well as Janet and her sisters Rebbie and La Toya separately.

Jon Hamm as the sheriff. They don’t do crossover episodes like they used to. Imagine if we saw Don Draper in the ’80s stumble across Hawkins, Indiana, on one of his drunken cross-country road trips and encounter Steve Harrington? Well, it’s not gonna happen, but we’ll get Fargo season five instead, which stars Mad Men’s Jon Hamm as Roy Tillman and Stranger Things’ Joe Keery as Gator, a father-son crime-fighting duo.

We ran into Joel Schumacher at last night’s Independent Filmmaker Project Spring Gala, where we had the chance to talk to him about his upcoming movie, Twelve. It’s an adaptation of Nick McDonell’s novel of Upper East Side teenage privilege (gone awry, of course), and stars that UES privileged-youth avatar, Gossip Girl’s Chace Crawford. We talked to Schumacher (St. Elmo’s Fire, The Lost Boys) about the dangers of working with Crawford in a neighborhood where hunting for Gossip Girl stars is a deadly sport.

Joel Schumacher’s 25th-odd film, Twelve — the movie version of young author Nick McDonell’s 2002 novel about rich, lost Upper East Side kids — opened over the weekend, featuring Chace Crawford, Emma Roberts, and 50 Cent. At Sarabeth’s on the Upper East Side, the tanned, lean, laid-back septuagenarian maker of eighties classics St. Elmo’s Fire and The Lost Boys (as well as a couple nipple-heavy Batman films) spoke with us about coming full circle back to rich brats in his movies, why he identifies with Crawford’s character in Twelve, and why comparisons between Twelve and Gossip Girl haven’t made him any more a watcher of the show than he already was.

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